Friday Funnys, or is it Friday's Funnys , or Friday is Funny???

[sofadoc]

Actually, April 12 is the birthday of 2 great Americans. David Letterman, and my oldest daughter (different years of course).

[gene]

Sofadoc, I was at both of my children's deliveries and I found nothing funny about either one. Seeing a newborn baby with yuckie stuff all over it tends to not be a time of jocularity. I was not laughing up a storm all those times that I helped birth baby cows either.

Hey, any Cleveland Browns football fans out there? Well, here's one.

http://www.wimp.com/clevelandbrowns/

gene

[gene]

This does not come under the category of "funny", so I am hijacking my own topic.

At least it's Friday!

We have talked about excellence and craftsmanship on this forum often. I first heard of this guy on Penn and Teller Fool Us (A British TV show). He did another card trick that fooled Penn and Teller.

This card trick is the most beautiful card trick I have ever seen. This is "excellence" in the field of close up magic.

I hope you enjoy it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgVwJek-fXY

gene

[Darren Henry]

Actually, April 12 is the birthday of 2 great Americans.

And at least one Canadian I'm pretty fond of. It was my youngest step-son's 35th.

[gene]

Tomorrow is April 17!!!

1. I have a friend who says we need to pay more taxes.

2. He has a friend who I met this past December. This friend of my friend does not eat meat - NOT because he is against eating meat, but because cow farts (he said 'methane gas from cows') are causing global warming and if people would stop eating meat then we would not have as many cows.

Who is the biggest idiot?

#1. My friend. >:(

#2. My friends friend. :P

#3. Me for having friends like #1 and for having friends like #1 who have friends like #2.  :-*

gene

[kodydog]

This does not come under the category of "funny", so I am hijacking my own topic.

I hope you enjoy it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZgVwJek-fXY

gene

It put a smile on my face.

[gene]

A blond scanning her laptop for viruses.


http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/genejoe/3-12/virus-scan.jpg";



gene

[gene]

DO NOT EAT DONUTS AND DRIVE!

http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/genejoe/asdf/car-accidents04.jpg";



Honey dear, before you go to work this morning please be sure to fill the car up with gas. Thank you dear.

"http://i830.photobucket.com/albums/zz228/genejoe/asdf/car-accidents13.jpg"; target="


gene

[byhammerandhand]

It always surprises me that you should not "drive while distracted," yet every police car I see has a computer hanging off the dash, a police and/or other emergency two-way radio, a speed radar, probably a GPS, and the driver is on the phone.

DO NOT EAT DONUTS AND DRIVE!

[sofadoc]

It's not just driving a car:
http://www.nbcwashington.com/news/weird/NATL-Distracted-Pilot-Texting-Lower-Wheels-Airplane-Jetstar-Landing-Gear-148128655.html

[gene]

I have a relative who flys Fed Ex International. He is like Captain Sculley who landed that plane in the Hudson river. He said most pilots used to be like Captain Sculley - Professionals who loved to fly and were the best of the best or at least made as effort to be the best.

Today, most commercial pilots fly to make money. They may love flying, but their primary purpose is to make money. And most have second jobs or own other businesses that compete for their time and attention.

Do you remember last year when that commercial plane went 300 miles past the airport because both the pilot and co pilot were asleep?

gene

[gene]

In honor of all the Spam that has hit this forum over the years. We tip our hats to your efforts to make money with the least amount of effort possible.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8huXkSaL7o


gene

[kodydog]

Spam! Spam! Spam! Spam! Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!

[gene]

A man comes to work on Monday morning and he has two black eyes. His co-worker says "What happened to you?"

Actually they are in Canada, so what his co-worker really said, while sipping his double-double. was "Eh Hoser. So what happened to you, eh?"

The man with the two black eyes said that he was in church on Sunday. It was a hot, humid summer morning. The preacher went on and on and on. Finally, the sermon was over and the preacher asked everyone to stand for the closing hymn. (In gay churches, do they sing 'hims'? This was not a gay church. Do they have gay churches in Canada?)

He said a rather large woman was sitting in the pew in front of him. (These pews, by the way, were recently reupholstered by no1948 and he did an excellent job!)

When the woman stood up, her 'Sunday go to meeting' dress had caught in the crack of her rather large bottom. This man, with only the kindest of thoughts, reached forward and pulled said dress out of said crack.

The woman turned around and hit him right in the eye!

The co-worker, having finished his double-double and just popped the top of his first of many Molsens, said, "Eh, so then how did you get the other black eye,eh?"

He said, "Well, I got to thinking about it, and I thought that maybe that's the way the lady wanted her dress to be."

gene

[kodydog]

This could be about any politician but its always fun to poke fun at the president.

An elderly lady was walking on the golf course on the island of Martha's
Vineyard. She slipped and fell.

Obama who was behind her by chance, helped her to get up promptly. She
thanked him and he answered 

"It was a pleasure to help you. Don't you recognize me? I am your president. Are you going to vote for me
in the next election? "

The elderly woman laughed and replied:
''You know ... I fell on my ass ... not on my head!"