How do you know!

[SteveA]

You know you're in the Upholstery business when:

  * you can remove a staple you can't see even with your good glasses
  * when a job comes in you wish that it hadn't come for another 5 days
  * when your better half sees the fabric they say "really" ?


SA

[byhammerandhand]

You might be a woodworker if...

...you store turning stock under your bed.
...there is sawdust in your belly button.
...you can count fractions on your fingers.
...instead of saying "2 inches" you say "eight quarters".
...you are more concerned about dust collection than about the 50 extremely sharp chisels and saws hiding under that pile of shavings.
...there is more sawdust than lint in the lint screen in your dryer.
...you think your dandruff is sawdust
...you wash your hair and sawdust clogs the drain.
...you stop to pick up a pallet on the side of the road for the white oak scrap.
...you've picked through the dumpster at a custom cabinet shop for exotic wood scraps.
...you leave your $30,000 car in the driveway so you don't scratch your new tablesaw in the garage.
...you've bought $3000 worth of tools to make $300 worth of furniture.
...you know how to pronounce "ipe", and its country of origin.
...you know hollow ground has nothing to do with coffee
...someone says burl and your first thought isn't Ives
...someone says birdseye and your first thought isn't frozen vegetables
...you have sawdust in your bra (or underwear for the guys)
...you have a tape measure in your purse or pocket
...you won't buy a piece of furniture because you know you could make it better and/or cheaper yourself
...you can identify woods by smell.
...you've never uttered the phrase "You know, I think I've got enough clamps."
...you run your hand over a piece of wooden furniture rather than just looking at it.
...you're short half a finger and you haven't actually bought Christmas gifts in 10 years.
...you feel this unexplainable emptiness every time you throw a piece of wood in the fire
...your wife doesn't bother to call around looking for you any more. She just goes out to the shop when she needs you for anything.
...at your spouse's suggestion, you put a telephone, TV, and refrigerator in your shop... so you don't have to "carry sawdust into the house all day."
...you really - honestly - whole-heartedly - are torn between taking that vacation in Hawaii and buying that new big new power tool

[SteveA]

My Favorite = ...you run your hand over a piece of wooden furniture rather than just looking at it.

SA

[sofadoc]

...you really - honestly - whole-heartedly - are torn between taking that vacation in Hawaii and buying that new big new power tool

That's a no-brainer.

The power tool will help you make a lot of money over the next 10 years. Which is precisely how long it will take to pay off that Hawaiian vacation. 

[gene]

Burl - I thought of 'Ives' before I read the rest of the statement. "The Big Country" an awesome movie.

you have sawdust in your bra (or underwear for the guys)

Are you implying that men do not wear bras and women do not wear underwear?

It's been many moons ago, and I did post this story here, when I got an email picture from a friend of a really great sofa. I emailed back describing the features and details of that sofa - wanting to show off a bit of my knowledge. He replied asking if I noticed the naked lady sitting on the sofa. I had not.  :o I chocked it up to my interest in fine furniture, rather than old age. This is when I knew I was in the upholstery business.

gene

[sofadoc]

And if there are any upholsterers wearing bras, odds are one of the clasps has been replaced by a hog ring.

[gene]

Do you think any female upholsterers would replace their nipple rings with a hog ring? I certainly would not replace mine.  :o

gene