Mojo's Friday Funnies

[Mojo]

Four old retired guys are walking down a street in Apache Junction, Arizona. They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - all drinks 10 cents". They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true.

The old bartender says in a voice that carries across the room, "Come on in and let me pour one for you! What'll it be, Gentlemen?"

There seemed to be a fully-stocked bar, so each of the men ask for a martini. In short order, the bartender serves up four iced martinis; shaken, not stirred, and says, "That'll be 10 cents each, please."

The four men stare at the bartender for a moment. Then look at each other; they can't believe their good luck. They pay the 40 cents, finish their martinis, and order another round. Again, four excellent martinis are produced with the bartender again saying, "That's 40 cents, please." They pay the 40 cents, but their curiosity is more than they can stand. They have each had two martinis and so far they've spent less than a dollar.

Finally one of the men says, "How can you afford to serve martinis as good as these for a dime a piece?"

"I'm a retired tailor from Chicago," the bartender said, "and I always wanted to own a bar. Last year I hit the Lottery for $25 million and decided to open this place. Every drink costs a dime - wine, liquor, beer, it's all the same."

"Wow! That's quite a story," says one of the men.

The four of them sipped at their martinis and couldn't help but notice seven other people at the end of the bar who didn't have drinks in front of them, and hadn't ordered anything the whole time they were there.

One man gestures at the seven and asks the bartender, "What's with them?"

The bartender says, "Oh, they're all retired upholsters waiting for happy hour when drinks are half price."

[Cheryl]

ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Gregg @ Keystone Sewing]

Not bad  :)

[Mojo]

You out of anyone should find the humor in that one considering we beat you senseless over prices any chance we get. :)

Chris

[Gregg @ Keystone Sewing]

You out of anyone should find the humor in that one considering we beat you senseless over prices any chance we get. :)

Chris

Yikes, that's a near low blow, and didn't think things would degenerate to this level; this is where I work best at, so watch yo step!   ;D

[RiCat]

St. Peter was on duty one day at one of the Pearly Gates when this fellow come walking up. St. Peter ask him, "What did you do with your time while you lived in the world?" The fellow answered him, "I was a Lawyer while I lived in the world" and St. Peter said to him, "Naw, uh uh, you don't get to come in here, you just turn right around and get on down there to that place that is HOT!"

St. Peter went back to doing his thing and up walks another fellow. Well, St. Peter ask again, "What did you do with your time while you lived in the world?" The fellow answered him and said, "I was a Banker." St. Peter started laughing and said, "Your pulling my leg, right? No buddy, you don't get to come in here. You just turn it right around and just head on down there where it's HOT!"

Well, St. Peter was standing there and here comes another fellow. Again, St. Peter ask him the same question, "What did you do while you lived in the world?" and the fellow answered him "I was an upholsterer while I lived in the world." St. Peter said to him, "Well shoot son, you come on in, you done
been through your hell."

Rick