Mojo's Friday Funnies

[Mojo]

Robert goes golfing every Saturday. One Saturday, he comes home three hours late. His wife asks him, "What took you so long?"

The guy says, "That was the worst game of golf I've ever had. We got up to the first tee, and Charlie hit a hole-in-one and immediately dropped dead of a heart attack."

The guy's wife says, "That's terrible!"

The guy says, "I know. Then, for the rest of the game, it was hit the ball, drag Charlie, hit the ball, drag Charlie, hit the ball, drag Charlie..."

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Bin Ladens last words: " I need a home filled with Navy Seals like I need a hole in my head ".

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An elderly couple were killed in an accident and found themselves being given a tour of heaven by Saint Peter. "Here is your oceanside condo, over there are the tennis courts, swimming pool, and two golf courses. If you need any refreshments, just stop by any of the many bars located throughout the area."

"Heck, Gloria," the old man hissed when Saint Peter walked off, "we could have been here ten years ago if you hadn't heard about all that stupid oat bran, wheat germ, and low-fat diets!"


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Marriage requires a man to prepare 4 types of "rings":
* The Engagement Ring
* The Wedding Ring
* The Suffe-Ring
* The Endu-Ring

Have a great weekend everyone. Be safe out there and enjoy.

Mojo

[gene]

Diape-ring
Pampe-ring
Fathe -ring

I love a gal and she loves me.
She's the hog calling champion of Tennessee.
She's got pretty teeth in her mouth.
One points north and the other points south.

gene

[Gregg @ Keystone Sewing]

Ha Ha, didn't take long for the 1st OBL joke to show up!@#

Good one Mojo, have a blessed day, thanks for sharing with us.   :)

[SHHR]

Speaking of OBL, bartenders have created a drink commemorating his death simply called the bin Laden. It's two shots and a splash of water.  ;D
Kyle

[Allan]

SCOTTISH COMPASSION

There was a man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.

Three women - one from England, one from Wales, and one from Scotland walked past and felt sorry for the poor man.
The English woman asked, "Have you ever had a hug old boy?" The man said, "No." So she gave him a hug and walked on.

The Welsh woman asked, "Have you ever had a kiss deary?" The man said, "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The Scottish woman came to him and asked, "''ave ya ever been fooked, laddie?" The man broke into a big smile and said, "No." She said, "Aye, ya will be when the tide comes in."

[Mojo]

LOL..............

Allan, your hilarious mate.........:)

Chris

[Darren Henry]

OMG Allen ; forwarding that to my Dad as soon as the bloody tears quit and I stop laughing. 8)

[Allan]

An old sea captain was sitting on a bench near the wharf when a young man walked up and sat down. The young man had spiked hair and each spike was a different color.... green, red, orange, blue, and yellow.
After a while the young man noticed that the captain was staring at him.

"What's the matter old timer, never done anything wild in your life?

The old captain replied, "Got drunk once and married a parrot. I was just wondering if you were my son!"