Friday Funny

[byhammerandhand]

CHECK FOR ALZHEIMER'S - PRETTY AMAZING


The following was developed as a mental age assessment by the School of Psychiatry at Harvard University .
Take your time and see if you can read each line aloud without a mistake.

The average person over 40 years of age cannot do it!

1.    This is this cat.
2.    This is is cat.
3.    This is how cat.
4.    This is to cat.
5..   This is keep cat.
6.    This is an cat.
7.    This is old cat.
8.    This is fart cat.
9.    This is busy cat.
10.  This is for cat.
11.  This is forty cat..
12.  This is seconds cat.


Now go back and read the third word in each line from the top down.

[Darren Henry]

 ;) 'Ya got me ---again--- 8)

But for 48.75 years old, I did alright. I knew well before the end of the first period that there was some thing up. Early in the second, I was scrambling in the corners of my mind to dig up that old puck of information ,but was focused on not dropping  momentum on the line change. In the final period I watched that puck get bigger and bigger----and then it hit me! ;D :P .----read the row of letter that are aligned vertically.

Thanks Keith;  Good one!

[Darren Henry]

I ran this one a while ago. You  old lifer's sit back for a sec and let the newer members and the forgetful ones  learn a second English language 8)

Canada's (l)east coast ;)  speaks and function in English.But they can have an accent; like the Cajuns in the US, or the Cockney's in the UK, et al.

Here is the university of Newfoundland's entrance exam :Please  read this aloud :

M R Ducks
M R knot
MR sew
Cedar wings?
Whale oil
Beef hooked
M R ducks.

I'd love to hear  ::) I guess read   ::) the spelling in the UK/US/AUS/etc.


D.S answer to follow later ;D

[Mike]

I failed

  hi darren

[Darren Henry]

D.S answer: It is an argument between two people that reads as follows.

first person; " (th) em are ducks"
Udder fella    "(th)em are not"
first guy        "(th)em are so, see their wings?"
other guy     "well I'll be (sound it out  ;) ) (th)em are ducks.

[Darren Henry]

Here's a cute one from my Dad;

This says it all about getting older & the whole aging thing.

An elderly couple Pauline & Frank were recently attending church services at The Villages.

About halfway through the service, Pauline took a pen and paper out of her purse, and wrote a note and handed it to Frank .

The note said:" I just let out a silent fart, what do you think I should do?"

Frank scribbled back: "Put a new battery in your hearing aid."

[byhammerandhand]

An older woman was visiting her doc and had a physical exam.  After the exam, the doc asked, "Mrs. Smith, are you having any problems of any type?"

Mrs. Smith says, "Well, I do have this one little problem with what I call 'gas release.'   They're just like farts but they make absolutely no noise and have no smell at all.  More of an irritation than anything else. In fact, I had a couple of them while you were doing my exam 'down there'."

The doc write out a prescription and says, "Fill this, take two a day, and come back in two weeks for a follow up."

Mrs. Smith comes back in two weeks and says, "Wow, doc, whatever you gave me sure made my little 'gas releases' smell.  I don't know what was in them, but whoo-boy."

Doc says, "OK, we have your nasal problem resolved, now let's get you in for the hearing test."

[byhammerandhand]

A man comes running to the doctor shouting and screaming in pain. "Please, doctor, you've got to help me. I've been stung by a bee!"

"Don't worry," says the doctor. "I'll put some cream on it."

"You will never find that bee. It must be miles away by now."

"No, you don't understand!" answers the doctor. "I'll put some cream on the place you were stung."

"Oh! It happened in the garden behind my house."

"No, no, no!" says the doctor getting frustrated. "I mean on the part of your body the bee stung you."

"On my finger!" screamed the man in pain. "The bee stung me on my finger and it really hurts!"

"Which one?" the doctor asked.

"How am I supposed to know? All bees look the same to me!"