Friday

[gene]

How about them Bengals? Snatched defeat from the jaws of victory once again. Third time an NFL team has lost in overtime from a safety.

I read last week where a man was killed in Cricket. Hit in the head by the ball. Now that's a sticky wicket. I never thought of Cricket as a dangerous game before.

I wonder how much glue it would take to make a sticky wicket?

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a boomerang that does not come back? A stick.

Obamacare: putting a stick to the working folks "up where the sun don't shine."

gene

[byhammerandhand]

A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cab driver won't stop staring at her.

She asks him why is he staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."

She answers, 'My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun a long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2 you must be Catholic."

The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too!"

The nun says "OK, pull into the next alley." He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

"My dear child, said the nun, why are you crying?"

"Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I'm married and I'm not Catholic."

The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kevin and I'm on my way to a Halloween party."

[SteveA]

The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"

 

My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!"  "Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"