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Mojo's Friday Funnies

Started by Mojo, July 29, 2011, 06:32:57 am

Previous topic - Next topic

Mojo

Yes, I am back. :)

Have a great weekend everyone.

Chris

Gene was walking down the street when his buddy SofaDoc
rides up on a shiny new Honda motorcycle.

"Where did you get such a great bike?", asked Gene.

SofaDoc replied, "Well, I was walking along
yesterday minding my own business when a beautiful woman
rode up on this bike. She jumped off the motorcycle,
took off all her clothes and said 'Take what you want.'"

Gene nodded approvingly, "Good choice; the clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

************************

A DEA officer stopped at a ranch in Texas , and talked with an old rancher.
He told the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs."
The rancher said, "Okay , but don't go in that field over there.....", as he pointed out the location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded saying, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government with me !"

Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish.... On any land !!
No questions asked or answers given!! Have I made myself clear......do you understand ?!!"

The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.

A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up, and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's big Santa Gertrudis bull......

With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that he'd sure enough get gored before he reached safety. The officer was clearly terrified.
The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs.....

" Your badge..........Show him your badge "

sofadoc

Speaking of motorcycle humor:
Q: What's the difference between a Hoover and a Harley?
A: On a Hoover, the dirtbag is on the FRONT.
"Perfection is the greatest enemy of profitability" - Mark Cuban