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 The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."

The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate,' not 'fascinating'."

Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated."

The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate'."

Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because she had been burned by Little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate," so she called on him.

Johnny said, "My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her boobs are so big she can only fasten eight!"

The teacher sat down and cried.

[National accounts]

Good thoughts, Floyd.

I've stayed out until now because I'm strictly in the "repair" column.  I do a mix of wood, upholstery, and install/repair (frames, recliner parts, etc.)   I'm "semi-retired" now so I've cut way back on customers.   But at its peak, pretty much in descending volume

National accounts -- there are a number of companies that have a network of technicians to service furniture.  Of those:
- warranty work from mfr / retail chains
- "protection plans" sold by retailers and underwritten and serviced by another company
- direct to consumer services (co. gets a cut, but they handle all the advertising, billing, and customer acquisition)

Pre-delivery service from "last mile" delivery service companies, either dispatched by nation account or delivery co. and billed back to retailer or mfr.

Moving Companies Post-move repairs that can be about anything from scratches, tears, broken glass, damaged appliances, to damaged wallboard (which I subbed out).  You need to have broad skills to do these. I think if you limited to "cloth and leather" only, you probably won't make their list often.

Local retailers (these really took a hit after the 2008 "Great Recession", so thankful to have the above)  Thinking about it, more than half of my regulars are now out of business.  One of the larger ones went from 4 stores to 1.

Direct to consumer.   I was generally busy enough I did not need to advertise or promote much.   Small web site.  Getting good reviews on Angie's List was a big boost here.   You can encourage clients to write a review for you, even if not a member (though now I think membership is free and open).  Yellow pages was pretty much a waste, and very expensive in my area (min. $300/month for a credit card sized ad.)   A "remote call forwarding" listing was cheaper by 2/3 than a business land-line and it auto-forwarded to my mobile phone.

The advantages of this is I didn't need a storefront and staff it.   Disadvantages is you spend a lot of time on the road and have to be very diligent about scheduling.   I always hated "We'll be there between 8 and 12, then have them call at 1 and say they are "running a little late."  This is not good for anyone that has to take off work, take care of kids from school, etc.)   I generally give people an exact time and get there +-10 minutes.

Here's a podcast done by some friends of mine who run a consulting / education business in woodworking.   The guest is another guy I know who is a third generation "housewright" who specializes in historic renovations.  While the context is "quitting your job and starting into the furniture business,"  it also applies to trades like upholstery.    Fast forward to 1:00 to bypass the intro and sales pitch. 

https://360woodworking.com/piddle-parade-360w360-e-223/

At a travel agency in Shanghai, I asked the Chinese girl behind the counter if she could escort me on a city tour and asked her for her mobile number so I could call her to make arrangements.
She gave me a big smile, nodded her head and said, "Sex sex, wan free sex for tonight".
I replied, "Wow, you Chinese women are really hospitable!
A guy standing next to me overheard, tapped me on the shoulder and said, "What she really said was: 66136429."

SofaDoc, I'd agree in general most men really don't care about their furniture so long as it serves the purpose. With the women you deal with, would you say you enjoy the work, and do you try to proliferate it as such?

I generally enjoy doing business with women. Since most are over 50, they have now reached the point in life where they have their own discretionary income. They don't have to get approval from hubby.

The few men that I deal with can tend to be anal. They obsess over all the specs on the back of the sample book and ask a lot of mind numbing questions. Then they try to pin me down to giving them an unconditional lifetime guarantee. Women just write the check, no questions asked. But most of the men that come in my shop are just accompanying their wives, and really offer no input. They don't want to say anything that will delay the process by causing the wife to start second-guessing herself. 

Interesting perspective, Sofadoc.  I have generally attributed that male behavior you describe as "engineer."

One of my retail clients had a recurring customer.   The guy was nice enough and just got a golden parachute from the company where he was CEO and the company got acquired.   The wife was generally known by the designers as a royal PIA.   Her background was lower class, so this was definitely, "new money."    She used to drag him along to the store about once a month, which was pretty obvious he hated or at least he didn't really care, he'd rather be doing something else..  She'd muddle about the store and every once in a while she'd yell out, "Allll-bert, .....  Allll-bert."  He'd come over and she'd point out something she'd like to buy.  I could just see him thing, "Just buy the damned thing and let's go home."

"Virgin aluminum?"    That comes from ugly bauxite?

Gene has a good idea -- pull out some and burn.  This chart is for fibers, but gives you some idea what to look for in the burn and ash, and smell.

http://www.fabricmartfabrics.com/Burn-Test-Chart.html

Talked to my daughter's father-in-law a couple of weeks ago.  He and his brother run a small third-generation  bakery.

He has the same problem, getting people to show up regularly.   Millenials, near-retirees, doesn't matter.   They either get enough money to get by for the moment, or start reaching the point where their welfare payments will stop.   So they don't show up.

For those of you that do work for restaurants, do you find that they think you should be getting $2.45 an hour for your labor?   In my limited experience with them, yes.

I used to do a lot of chair re-glues for the upscale pancake house down the street from my old house.   These chairs were well beyond their life, almost disgusting in the amount of wear and tear, to say nothing of the looseness.   I think I finally convinced the owner to pick up some new ones, which he started gradually doing.


Topic drift -- isn't that something to do with sailboats?

Ok which of you out there is responsible for this delay?

Well that leaves me out. I hate math which is why I married a woman with a Masters in Math Education. I let her do the math for me.......:)

" Use measuring tools and perform basic math computations; "

Chris

Me too, but after about 10 years, she gave up teaching, started doing and teaching taxes, got an Enrolled Agent certificate, then a CPA.  Then went to work in corporate accounting.    But I have bachelor's and masters' degrees in theoretical math.

A few days later,...

Keith, Dennis, and Gene were all sitting in their rocking chairs at the nursing home one evening.

Right then a shapely young aide walks by and all three lean over and look at her figure.

Keith says, "Boy, if I were thirty years younger, I'd run right over and give her a big hug."

Gene says, "Boy, if I were thirty years younger, I'd run right over and give her a big hug. Then I'd give her a  big kiss."

Dennis says, "Boy, if I were thirty years younger, I'd run right over and give her a big hug. Then I'd give her a  big kiss.  And what was that other thing we used to do???"




(and as it turns out my customer mentioned a name of a guy I know -- he went to my church and I'd done some work for him and his wife.   Shortly before going to this home,  he was widowed.    My customer said, "Oh, do you know his girlfriend, Cindy,  she lives right across the hall here."    No, I didn't.   He said his family was trying to convince him to marry Cindy, but he was working with the home's management (a church-sponsored home) to see if they'd just them move in together.)

But wait, there's more...

Did some work for a guy in a retirement home yesterday -- two walkers, a scooter, three "grabbers", a wall full of snacks and he told me that the cafeteria breakfasts rotated between link sausage, bacon, patty sausage and ham.  Once in while pancakes.

Not there yet.

Stopped by my daughter's place yesterday to do some work.  I hadn't drunk my coffee much that morning and it was tepid.  She asked if I wanted a coffee to go.  She made one in her Keurig and warned me it would be hot.   I let it sit in the thermal mug for a couple of miles and took a tiny sip.  Hot but fine.   A few minutes later I took a larger sip. HOLY COW.   It burnt my mouth and gave me a headache.   If the window had been open I would have spit it out.

Wheel of Fortune just came on.   Did you know Vanna White is 59?!   And she makes $4,000,000 a year for looking good and doing a job that does not need to be done.

Two things to consider
A.  Oak is generally a very easy wood to color.   It does not have the blotching problems that other woods like cherry, maple, poplar and pine have.

B. If this is factory made, it's their goal to get it in and out of the finish room in a short amount of time.  So generally fast-drying and sprayed.   If it's been re-done in a custom refinishing shop, where they might be working on a handful at a time, they might be able to afford to apply a coat, put it to the side and let it dry overnight while working on one of the other pieces.


As to what you have:  Can it be--
#1 Dye - if there is little contrast between the earlywood (open pores) and latewood it would tend to indicate dyes.  The dyes I'm familiar with are dissolved in water or alcohol.   There are others that are dissolved in other solvents, but the only ones of these I'm aware of are in canned stains.

#2 Pigmented stain - gives more contrast between early- and late-wood, generally.    Note also that some (consumer brands) stains contain both pigment and dye.  Could be the same with commercial, too.

#3 Finish itself.   Sitting beside me is a cherry keeping chest I made recently.  I put on a coat of boiled linseed oil, let it sit on the patio for a week to get sun exposure and let the BLO cure.  Then I applied a blonde shellac.   It created a 10+ year patina in the matter of a few days.   But factory furniture, consider point B, above.  On  other pieces, I've used water-borne finishes that are clear, often cool bluish, to perfectly clear lacquer, to a variety of varnishes and shellacs that impart little to a lot of color

#4 Toners - often used in factories, add color and finish, two coats, slam-bam-thank-you-m'am dry 30 minutes and package.  Since the color wears off on high-wear areas, this seems likely for that reason, too.

#5 Glazes - time consuming both because of dry time and need to hand manipulate.  Likely only seen on custom work, high end work, or to achieve a specific look -- glazes over paint, "dirty up" or highlight details, carvings, distressing.  Normally it takes overnight for these to dry unless you hit a very specific window (say 30-90 minutes) and apply lacquer   known as "shooting through the glaze."   And yes, this requires one or more coats of finish or sealer, a glaze coat and one or more coats over the glaze.